IF I WERE BILL GATES . . .
Breaking up Microsoft could be Bill Gates'
path to world domination.
Geniuses don't work nine to five, so I wasn't surprised to receive a phone call from Dr. W. W. Web, Distinguished Professor of Netology, at four o'clock in the morning. It seems he had come up with a way for Microsoft to settle its antitrust problems and wanted to know if I had Bill Gates' number.
Unfortunately, Bill made me promise not to give out that information, so I wasn't able to help. I did, however, arrange to meet the good doctor at the neighborhood Waffle House so he could share his ideas with my readers. Excerpts of our conversation follow:
Net Detours: So, what would you do if you were Bill Gates?
Dr. Web: Well, the first thing I'd do is fill up the pool at the new house with hundred dollar bills and dive in.
ND: Actually, I and my readers are more interested in how you would respond to the Justice Department's antitrust suit against Microsoft.
Dr. Web: Too bad, I haven't even gotten to the good stuff yet. But, if you insist on talking business, I'd simply break up the company.
ND: That should dispel any rumors that your long absence from this column was due to a multi-million dollar grant from Microsoft Corporation.
Dr. Web: It makes perfect sense really. Janet Reno would look like the greatest trust buster ever - people might even forget that special prosecutor stuff - and in return I'd get the government off my back.
ND: Then what would you do?
Dr. Web: Exactly what I've been trying to do all along. Incorporate the browser into the operating system. Once that's out of the way I can concentrate on ruling the world.
ND: I'm not sure I see how that would work.
Dr. Web: I break the company into three parts. I keep Microsoft which controls the Windows operating system and I rake in billions selling my share of the new "Baby Microsofts" - MS Office which sells business applications and MS Network which controls Microsoft's online properties and the Explorer browser.
ND: How does giving up Explorer help you?
Dr. Web: It's simple. Since Microsoft no longer owns a browser, it's free to incorporate browser technology into the operating system - call it Net Windows. Unless Netscape and MS Network incorporate my technology into their products, they aren't "Windows Compatible" which means no one will use them. I may not own a browser, but I now control both of them. Of course it doesn't really matter since browsers are doomed anyway.
ND: Why is that?
Dr. Web: Once the functionality of a browser is available from the OS, software makers will begin to incorporate it into their products - not just browsers but word processors, spreadsheets, games, everything. Pretty soon you won't be able to tell the difference between being online and off.
At that point the browser is obsolete. Or more accurately, the operating system is the browser. Which is pretty ironic considering that Netscape used to claim that the browser would become the new operating system.
That will kill Netscape but MS Network won't care.
ND: Why Not?
Dr. Web: Because all they will care about is being the world's largest provider of online services. They couldn't care less how people access them.
ND: And what about MS Office.
Dr. Web: They win too. They already control most of the market for word processors, spreadsheets, databases and more. With the Justice Department out of the way, they'll be able to buy up the competition in the areas they don't control.
ND: But won't the Baby Microsofts eventually compete with Microsoft itself.
Dr. Web: Sure, just like the Baby Bells compete against AT&T. But it's been two decades since that breakup and they still don't compete in most areas. If I'm Bill Gates I'm less concerned about competition twenty years down the road than I am about getting my current legal problems cleared up so I can concentrate on more important things.
ND: Such as?
Dr. Web: Spending time with the wife, raising the kid and, oh yeah, ruling the world.
